In the past several weeks, there have been multiple chest xrays, a chest CT scan, surgeries to put two semi-permanent drains in my lungs, and several doctor’s appointments. The drains allow me (well, my mom, the best nurse ever!) to drain at home and ease my breathing issues (coughing/shortness of breath). However, the CT scan showed that the trial was not working and there was significant progression. The doctor said I am out of options and referred me to hospice. After a few questions, I said, “I’m not surprised. I’ve watched enough friends die to know that when you start needing to have palliative care (ie, “comfort care” like having lungs drained, blood transfusions, platelet transfusions, not treatment like chemo) that the body is starting to shut down.” She said most of her patients say something similar when referred to hospice.
I’ve also watched enough friends die, and have witnessed what has/has not been helpful and how their loved ones have grieved. I ask that you respect this private time for my family, Corbin, and me. If you see Corbin and me out, please do NOT discuss my health in front of him. He is aware that I am no longer on treatment and what that means, however I still look just like “normal mommy”. At this point I am not confined to my bed or house, but am using my energy for my family.
My energy level varies from day-to-day and, as you can imagine, I’m saving all my energy for my family and Corbin. We ask for NO VISITORS at this time. I’ve seen very well intentioned people “drop off food” and want a quick visit. This could be during a time I’m sleeping or disrupt an intimate family time. Again, we ask for NO VISITORS. If things change and we are up for visitors, we will post that request.
My sister-in-law, Christy, is creating a memory book for Corbin and my family. If you’d like to contribute, please email firstname.lastname@example.org with the info below. If you have older pictures (non digital) that you’d like to send to include, please email Christy for specific instructions. Be sure to include:
How you knew me (or my family)
Funny stories, memories, PICTURES, etc
I have been very open in sharing my life, but now ask that you respect my desire to die in a private, dignified manner. Please do not expect a reply to emails/texts or returned calls from family. All updates will be posted here.